Wednesday, 25 June 2008

Bittersweet Goodbye #5: Take a hit.

heroin

If I just lay here, will the world realise? Will they realise that somebody from the population is missing?

I took a trip; I pierced my left arm with those needles; familiar, yet so foreign. Nobody knows what to do with me. I’ve been going on like this for as long as I can remember. Ever since I found my mothers stash. I still continued on, even after watching her cripple up on the floor, blood trickling out of her mouth, body contorting into odd shapes, eyes flickering back into her head. In fact, it inspired me, such a beautiful, dramatic death.

I saw the strip of neon, an oasis of colour and light. The drug rushed to my brain, it made me feel invincible, as if my soul was trying to break loose of my body. It made me wild with adrenaline, all this energy and nowhere to release it. So I just lay there, and witnessed the display of colours the drug had to show me. I loved every explosion of light; I loved how each sound was blasted louder than normal. I loved how the drug made me feel free.

Back to my question, I don’t see why they should; the world is swarming with people more important than I. We're all too busy with our monotonous lifestyles, and our nonchalant routines. There isn’t a person who would take time off their meaningless tasks to think about that person lying on her bathroom floor, dying.

Ironically, my temporary escape is what's permanently letting me go. It's bringing me across that bridge between life and death, and there's no turning back.

8 comments:

giaaaa!:) said...

i need a minute to take in the english and WOWness of it.:)

Anonymous said...

r u saying what I think ur saying?

....ur an addict?

Joanna Superstuff said...

wait, wait, wait. WHO'S ANONYMOUS? is it you, Trett? NO I'M NOT AN ADDICT. If we play by those rules i'll also be considered as Murderer.

Anonymous said...

Trett? no, no. we don't know each other. I just randomly found your blog.

Sorry i called u an addict though, that was poor judgement on my part.

ur a great writer btw.

again, really, im very very sorry

Anonymous said...

this is just amazing.. you made one person think you're an addict.. your blog seems just real. it's like you have experienced it.. but you haven't and that's something not everyone can do i guess.. keep it up!

Joanna Superstuff said...

Oh, no worry anonymous 1, i took it lightly :)) i thought you were a friend of mine, you sound like him.

Thanks for the compliments, that's great :)
You can read my "About Joanna Kennedy" to get the basic idea of who i am. farrrr from an addict.

Joanna Superstuff said...

Plus, A1, i'd just like to say im only 15, and personally i find that a tad bit young to be an addict :P
thanks again for viewing my blog.

Bianx said...

Wow~~ x3 your such a great and deep writer joanna~ :] i loved it!

^^ though it was like i was having a nosebleed cuz of the deepness of some words, it was worth it. ;] haha