20.10.08

Last night, I wrote a passage.
Around 600 words, about 3 emotions:
Despair, Worry & Fear.
True feelings about a recent event.
And last night, that passage was unintentionally destroyed.

Now I wont be able to get the words back,
or that moment of emotion.

---
I remember when I first met him, I felt some sort of connection. Like we were two travelers in a world unknown, a world we were new in. We were different and alike in so many ways. But it wasn't just me, he sparked this connection with everyone, he was on the same level as the kids below us, and on the same level as the teachers above us, all at the same time.

The day of revelation came, I was surprised to find out I was not one of the chosen few who knew before the curtain dropped. Maybe I saw our friendship as more than it really was, maybe I made myself feel too close because of our similarities, maybe.

I didn't like the way she had made it sound so final, as if there was nothing anyone could do. I always chose to believe in hope, in that slim chance of the unlikely actually happening, in miracles.

But the day came, it actually came. And the hope I held onto so tightly faltered, withered in my hands, slipped through my fingers. I suddenly felt so much fear for what was going to happen, and my tears fell straight to the floor, not even bothering to rest on my cheeks.